A look through the large picture window in Leola’s living room tells her it is a gloomy rainy day with no hope of sunshine. It’s a cold gloomy day inside Leola’s heart too. She has been true to her words to read the Bible every day although it has done nothing to defrost her frozen in time heart. She had hoped for something different but her thoughts were getting worse. She sits staring at the drops of water outside hitting her window and rolling down to the ledge wishing she was one of those drops with no feelings and no expectations. She is feeling crushed by her feelings of hopelessness. There is no hope for tomorrow to be different and no hope for the future to get better. The Bible to this point has not told her what to do about the condemnation of sin she is under. If this is what understanding is Leola wants none of it!
She doesn’t know how to fix herself! She has never watched a Christian fix themselves before. Her lack of hope invades her mind constantly. The past three years of reading the Bible and going to church have done nothing to help her as a matter of fact she is beginning to believes Scripture and church are making it worse. She has read through the Bible once, gone to multiple Bible studies and hooked up with many Christians over the years but none have admitted to trials or conviction of sin. She knows of no one who is worse off than her! She now believes her public plastic face will be the only face she will wear. Her hidden grief is almost intolerable!
We go to church and we discuss our problems with people but do we truly understand it is God who is supposed to teach us His ways not man. Sometimes it is easier to turn to man. I am completely guilty of this concept. We either do one of two things as growing Christians – we go to people or we ask our own soul! It is very peculiar that we do those things because we have known they are not successful yet we continue. Man wants what he wants and he goes the way he wants to go and our soul knows no better. We have no escape outside of obedience to God yet we try to make a way. We rely on man and his miracle pills when we expect them to fix us.
We are God’s children and as such we must learn from the Spirit what to do and how to do it. He says to us “I will instruct you and teach you in the way which you should go; I will counsel you with My eye upon you.” (Psalm 32:8) We can count on Elohim to instruct us and to counsel us. He has counselled us to be convicted of our sin and then He instructs us in the way we should go to escape the sin. This is not an easy task but we can do it! We must do it!
At the end of one of her mind numbing days, talking about her problems with any old person, she retires to her have-to-have-it couch with her promise to read the Scriptures. Tonight, she is going to let gravity choose her reading because this is the way she rolls. She doesn’t actually care about what she is about to read because her grief has made her apathetic. She opens the Bible and drops it on her lap but doesn’t begin to read. Leola sighs and stares. It is still raining out so she listens to the sound of it hitting her front window while consorting with it. If it isn’t raining, it is raining! Each rainy day is running into the next and her grief is beginning to overwhelm her to the point of giving up. Being in Heaven will be much better than being here.
She finally looks down to see what gravity has done for her. At this point in her walk she doesn’t realize that gravity was created by God for His glory and He will use it for His glory too. Psalm, why does gravity always bring her to the Psalms? She chose Psalm 32 for her reading. As she read the tears ran down her face like the rain on her window. This God she didn’t understand and didn’t really know had written about her grief over her sin long before she was even born. She read the Psalm three times stopping each time on verse 8 to soak it in. Her grief over her life did not stop that day but God revealed Himself to her as her teacher. She would submit to Him more and more each day being instructed how to change her life one minute at a time instead of expecting a miracle. With God as her Teacher she would learn her lessons well!
We are more than capable of overcoming sin if we allow Elohim to instruct us in the way we should go. Let the Spirit counsel you within your conviction then allow Him to instruct you in the way out of sin! With God as your Teacher you will learn each lesson well!